What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
