it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
