I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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