better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
