...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Randomize
