also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
one two three fourrrrnication!
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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