what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
