I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Randomize