Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
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