you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
