my mouth tastes like poor choices
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
