I wish I could punch you in the face.
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Randomize
