dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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