i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
