im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Randomize