I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
