He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
