I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Randomize
