Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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