hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Randomize
