Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Randomize
