Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Found your dick twin last night
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
