On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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