Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
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