Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize