there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
