Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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