I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
