Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Randomize
