lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize