love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize
