white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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