so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
