Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
