she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
