so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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