Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
