She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
It's no shave November. This is our time.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Randomize