Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Randomize
