I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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