Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
He literally asked permission to hit on me
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
