I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
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