Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
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