that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
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