i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
