all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
Randomize
