I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
