I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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