I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
