Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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