Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Randomize
