Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
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