We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize
